"Uncle, Telok Ayer street"
"Go by PIE?"
"No, ECP please"
5 seconds later
"PIE?"
"Uh. No. ECP"
"Orh ok"
Along the ECP
"Exit by Rochor Road can?"
"Erm no.. Exit by Marina South and then to Cross Street"
"Ok"
5 seconds later, he filters into the left lane.
"Rochor Road hor?"
"NO Marina South!"
"Orh okok" filters back and gets honked at by two cars
At Marina South T-junction
"Turn left?" (left leads to god knows where. Somewhere which looks like construction and jungle trees)
"Nono, turn right"
Naturally, he turns left
"UNCLE I SAID TURN RIGHT"
"Huh. Oh" stops the car in the middle of the lane and blocks every single car trying to turn left as it was a red light. We get honked at for the next 2 minutes.
Further down the road, he completely ignored the sign where it says turn right to enter Cross Street, and instead chose to drive straight ahead onto what looks to be the highway
"OMG UNCLE. TURN RIGHT THERE!!!!"
"What, where? Huh not go straight meh?" At this point I wanted to say FUCK IT and walk the next 2km to my office.
"NO. THE SIGN SAYS TURN RIGHT." He then attempts to make a U-TURN. ON A ONE-WAY ROAD. INTO ONCOMING TRAFFIC. I AM NOT FUCKING KIDDING.
Somehow we managed to make it out of that road in one piece and FINALLY onto Cross Street.
Now, Cross Street is a straight road. You'd think it really doesn't get any simpler than that.
"Go straight hor?"
No, I want you to make a sharp left here and ram the cab into the barricades because that's what I want to do to you. "Yah"
HE. THEN. FUCKING. TRIED. TO. TURN. RIGHT.
At this point I've already lost my cool. "UNCLE WHERE ARE YOU GOING? I SAID GO STRAIGHT"
Two minutes, 3 more times at failing to differentiate between left and right, I've arrived at my office, 13 bucks poorer and a desire to complain to the cab company and get them to fire this ridiculous person. But because I'm a nice person, I did no such thing.